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Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The Wedding is Canceled, What Should I Do?

It happens, for one reason or another, a
wedding is canceled. Sometimes it's for the
best, sometimes it causes great pain and grief.
And sometimes, things work out and the wedding
is rescheduled.

The first step is to take time to grieve the
relationship. Regardless of whether it was your
idea and you know it is for the best, there is a
grieving process involved. Go with it, pull yourself
together as best you can and have help from family
members or friends to deal with the situation.

If the invitations are out, it will involve sending out
cancellation notices or use the good old grapevine.
You'll have to call people. Split up the guest lists
between your family members and just do it. It won't
be easy, but you have to let them know there is no
wedding. If the invitations haven't been sent, skip
this entirely. The word will spread without you
having to do anything.

You'll need to notify your vendors.
The wedding reception site, the dress shop,
the cake baker, the florist, the photographer,
the DJ and other vendors involved in your wedding.
You will in all probability lose your deposits.
You'll have to read your contracts to see each vendor's
details. Some vendors will refund some of the
deposit if they can find another wedding to fill the
date. Others won't. Wedding dresses are custom
ordered and you will have to take possession of the
dresses. The manufacturers won't take them back
under any circumstances because they are custom
ordered just for you.

You can have your wedding dress preserved
or you can store it at home. Turn it inside out,
hang it by the dress hangers so the dress doesn't
stretch, and store it in a breathable storage bag
or wrap a white sheet around the dress. Put in
in a place where there aren't any dramatic
temperature changes and the dress will be fine.
Or sell the dress. If the memories are too painful,
sell it and get it out of your life.

If you have non imprinted favors, you can sell them
along with other decorations. Try Ebay or post on
a wedding board and you'll sell them.

If the invitations are printed, take them to a recycle
center.

You and the groom's family will need to decide
on financial responsibility for the outstanding bills.
If the groom called off the wedding, etiquette says
that he is responsible for a portion if not all of the
bills.

And finally, to quote the many times
married Zsa Zsa Gabor "Give back
the ring, dahling, but keep the diamond."

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